So Your wondering?

 

  So your wondering what God showed me, Well he showed me how when I get excited about a  somethings initially, it will sizzle out over time. My excitement has  to have passion behind it , in order to survive. Normally when I'm instructed to do something that is good for me or  God ordained, I normally want to run, and that turns out usually becoming my greatest passion.

 
  In my soul and all of my being I feel that God has put a business inside of me, but  I haven't tapped into what it is just yet.  I have tried and ,I'm  HUGE  Network marketing fan. I have tried my hand at a few of them and I was so "excited" to start!!!( I used the word "excited" meaning in my world excitement +  no passion means sizzle out soon). My very  first business venture,I saw it advertised in my mothers Black Enterprise Magazine!!! I just knew I would be a star, I took the  classes to sell insurance , so that I can  help people and make money and I never took the exam.  Then a few years had passed and I tried to bake my cookies, I ordered business cards, but I never got my DBA and I didn't have an industrial oven. I looked at it from a tax perspective, but didn't count all of the work that  I would have to be put into it, I realized I just wasn't ready!!! Plus I would only sell them 3 for $1. I liked doing it , but not everyday and didn't make enough to cover the cost.   Which brings me to my next business venture!!!! I love to help women, I believe we are the most wonderful creation God could have ever made!!! I was approached to sell makeup for one of the best makeup companies world wide!! Well first the person who approached (and she knows who she is) can sell swamp land to an alligator!!!!! The company believes in enriching women's lives!!!! I  love their model!!  God first then, family and then business. I was so " excited" again until I realized I'm allergic to some of the skin cleansers, the lip gloss, the eye shadow etc..!!!!!! uggggg Plus the product which is high quality was a little pricey for the circle I associated with. I felt bad charging them tax and shipping charges , sometimes the tax and shipping cost more than the item!!!!.. Now to know me I have to be able to promote something that works for me, and I'm a person who is all in!!!! well it got a little hard because, I would be asked does it work for me and ummmmmmmm I'm not a good fibber so I would point out what I can use. Well that gets old and the excitement fizzles eventually. So I kinda walked away, plus you have to be able to have great follow up skills, and I'm working on  my follow up skills everyday.  So while I was selling make up I was presented with another business!!! I saw $$$$$$$$ so at first I got" excited" because the presenter was someone I knew, and it was new to the area and wanted to be one of the first in!! Then I hesitated but I'm all about supporting family so I joined even though I don't travel, but I like money. No I'm not in love with money and it does have its place, I just wanted it in my place .Well you know the saying" to make money you have to invest money." I invested again for the fourth time. Well I asked everyone that my family didn't already ask.  Going for NO! wasn't hard that's all I heard, and when I finally got people on my team they didn't do any work to grow their business. I pondered  and pondered what can I do different?  My family is blowing this thing up WOW!!!! I was so proud of them.

    I began to seek God about it and he showed me, clear as day that wasn't his plan for my life so  I called my cousin and asked her to find a replacement for me and from what I here  he is doing phenomenal!!  I began to question God and ask well what is it that is in me that says business ?and would fit the plan he has in my life? He began to  show me how to trust him as we walk it out.

    I was approached about another  business and as I said before I like helping people and this business  meant I would help people with their utility bills, cut the cost. Here comes that "excitement " feeling again, but this time I stopped . I realized "excitement" about a business venture without passion only means broke lol!!!

   I stopped and declined and this time I was offered a free space, but one thing I have learned is "Seek ye first the kingdom of God and  his righteousness, and all these things shall be added unto you. " Matt 6:33.
     I  have been offered  more presentations which I will  definitely listen to and if God tells me to go forward I will, and if he doesn't I wont, but what I wont do is follow my "excitement."

   

 What I have found,  that burns passionately within me is the Success of my son's Moe and Sai and,their growth in Christ . Watching them reach their full potential in life no matter what others may say!!  I agonized over being a single mom at first, but my boys are the reason I push forward. My other  passion is completing the Masters program. This accomplishment may just be to push the next generation further, but I remember God whispering to me ,that it will be for the Glory of his Kingdom.  I will tell you I cried when I had to change from one major to another, but my life is not my own and as he orders my steps, yet I stumble and sometimes fall I will continue to walk forward. Lets walk together............