Monday, October 28, 2013

Oh My!!!

 
     I have been in a struggle all day today!!! after work I layed down before the second half of my day began. I began to reflect and that's not always a good thing!! I saw this person the other day that I have seen in the past and my eyes almost fell out. It was just a glance and I don't see this person that way but, he was so ------- I don't even have a word to describe him. My mouth hit the floor. I had to pull myself together quick. As the old folks would say "he was casket sharp"We have never communicated  verbally more than a "HI." I reached out to some friend to express what I saw and they saw it too. I was like wow!!.
     SO moving forward I lay down and another person comes to mind. I close my eyes and my mind wonders I STOP!!!! because that's not OK on any level. I had somewhere to be and I didn't want to get up .
     I finally pulled it together and left the house. While driving this overwhelming feeling came over me and my mind drifted again!!!! I could see the road but, what was in my head had me for a moment. I started praying please take this away, I feel like I'm at a cross roads by myself. OK now I really have to  focus. I finally have my meeting and all is well , the feeling is gone. I decide its a peaceful time to study and here that feeling comes  again. I'm reading and my mind begins to wonder again. I cant concentrate. There is an internal tug-a - war!!!!! who will win???
     Times like this I'm glad I am not just one phone call, text or drive away. I would fall  and who knows if I would be able to get back up. I have to resist the internal temptation and it will flee. I will wait !!and I can wait!!! til that day where forever  doesn't seem that long....

I've been single to long..... walk this journey out with me.......

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